Infomercials and the Secret to Saving the Economy

Survived jury duty after 2 days of sitting around making new friends (who unfortunately did not want to buy real estate from me) and a brutal questioning session where all my biases were exposed – apparently I love doctors and cops which makes me ineligible to be a juror in either drug cases or medical malpractice cases. Now it’s back to the grind – there are homes to be sold.

Real estate is a tough business and it only seems to be getting tougher. Developers are feeling the pressure from their banks, construction is being pinched by rising costs, and marketing and sales agents are running around like chickens with their heads cut off. I have figured it out though, I can solve the housing crises with my simple “buy one, get one free” incentive plan. It’s really quite straightforward. One of the biggest challenges facing the real estate market today is the over-supply or “gluttony” of homes, as analysts like to call it. By giving purchasers two homes at once we will be doubling the pace that real estate is absorbed. In addition, we will be increasing the rate that people buy at because no one can turn down a free home. It’s the like the “snuggie,” only better because you get a free home instead of just a free press open book light http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2xZp-GLMMJ0. It’s really a no brainer. “Hi, Tim Geithner? I have an idea…”

Check this out http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-2757699799528285056. Someone with a little too much time on their hands created a roller coaster animation tracing the rise and fall of real estate prices (not to worry it was adjusted for inflation) since the 1890’s. Unfortunately, the rollercoaster ends in 2006 when prices were just leveling out and robs us of the dramatic and nauseating thrill that 2007 – 2009 undoubtedly provides. It’s still pretty neat though.

Just a reminder tomorrow, Friday the 13th, is Colgate spirit day. Please be sure to wear an article of clothing showing your Colgate pride. No. I am serious.